Wear the short dress!

It's reasonable to believe that most of us have at least one insecurity we've carried with us over the years—those small self-doubts that surface when we're feeling vulnerable. It might be a physical feature, a personality trait, or a perceived flaw. One of my recurring insecurities is my legs. Over time, my legs have been my primary physical insecurity. As an adult, I've often opted for longer dresses over shorter ones due to this self-doubt. I also genuinely like the look of a maxi dress, so some of that choice is just preference, but on days when I'm feeling self-conscious, I will always choose the long dress over the short one. With the onset of perimenopause and the accompanying body changes and resulting insecurities, my preference for longer dresses has become even more pronounced.

Recently, I took my daughter and some of her friends to Richmond for shopping, giving me some time to shop alone. In one store, I discovered the most charming dress and tried it on. It wasn't my usual maxi- or midi-dress, but a lovely short summer dress. It fit perfectly, and I loved the style and print, so I bought the short dress!

The following week, I met with Bella (all names have been changed for privacy), and we discussed body image. We talked about how there are times when we're not happy with some aspect of our appearance. It's unrealistic to expect to love everything about our body every day. Instead, we should acknowledge what we're unhappy with, counter it with a positive thought, and not let the negative thought affect the rest of our day. The conversation shifted to whether she ever chose what to wear based on how she felt about a specific body part. I admitted that I sometimes avoided wearing certain clothes based on how I felt about my body, and while that's occasionally fine, such as not wanting to wear a tight outfit when feeling bloated during our period, it shouldn't be a regular habit. I told her about my recent purchase and that I planned to wear it to an upcoming concert, and I challenged her to do the same in the next two weeks.

Fast forward to that weekend, I packed my super cute short dress and drove to Richmond, where I was meeting my sister for the concert. Not only did I wear my new dress, but I also sported my giant knee brace in preparation for a night full of dancing, and we walked from the hotel to the concert venue. I made sure to send Bella a picture of me in the "short dress"! The bands playing were local bands popular during my high school and college years, so the venue was filled with fellow GenX'rs, and we were all there living our best lives! As the opening act began, I noticed one woman in a "Mama Bear" shirt absolutely jamming to the music, while another man wore an "Everything Hurts" t-shirt, laughing with a friend. The contrast of these middle adult life messages with the pure joy and unrestrained fun we were all having was a glorious sight. It was such a reminder that we only have one life, and we all deserve to enjoy as many moments as possible. Our children need to see us making choices to love ourselves and our lives. As the concert continued and the main act, the one I was really excited about, took the stage, my sister and I made our way to the front of the crowd, dancing and singing along like we were back in high school seeing them at the dance club where we used to watch them play. And it was the BEST night!! So, next time you think you're too old to dance at the front of a concert or don't have the "right" body to wear something—remember that you owe it to yourself to wear the short dress.